This is the part that I hate the most about writing. I’m sitting here and staring at a blank Word document (well, I was. Now I’m writing this…) and I’m hesitating to put down the first word. I’ve got the germ of the idea for the next book. I’ve even written the first page on paper with a pen. (Yep, paper and pen still exist!) I’ve got the character sketch for the main character done.
But, I’m still staring at that blank Word document and hesitating.
Well, a little bit of it might be because I’m the tiniest bit afraid. If I put that first word on the screen then I’m committed. I’m either committed in succeeding to write the book or in failing to write the book I started. It’ll either come to a big ol’ something or a big ol’ nothing. The big ol’ nothing scares me. I like the new character (her name is Kate and she’s the basis of the sequel to the last book, so I get to “hang out” with all of the other characters some more. Yay! I sort of never wanted to see them again for awhile. Now I kind of miss them…). I think I’m a little bit afraid of failing her. Unless you’ve written something before, that sounds insane because, as is obvious to us all, Kate only exists in my head so I can’t really fail her. But I can fail to tell the story that God’s placed in my brain, if that makes any sense at all. I can fail to make her come to life the way she’s meant to. That’s kind of what it is. I think.
But then I remember something… it’s hanging on the wall next to the computer. It’s Ephesians 6:19 and it says, “Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.” And there ya have it. That’s what I need to do. God’s word, God’s job, without fear. Yay, God!
So, I’m gonna go now and I’m gonna commit myself. It’s high time I did it. I wrapped up Going in Circles around mid-October and have been editing and “selling” ever since. It’s time I got around to putting that metaphorical pen on the metaphorical paper again, huh?
Or maybe I’ll go get lunch first?